


The Guilty Consequences

by kr33p3r



Category: Avatar: Legend of Korra
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Guilt, Hurt, Hurt/Comfort, Reader Insert, Reader-Insert, Redemption, Survivor Guilt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-12
Updated: 2021-02-12
Packaged: 2021-03-12 11:09:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29383950
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kr33p3r/pseuds/kr33p3r
Summary: Kuvira has achieved everything she's ever dreamed of. The Avatar and her fiancé are gone, Republic City has fallen, the Earth Empire is fully united, and there's nothing obstructing her goals anymore. But why does she feel the guilty consequences of her actions gnawing at her psyche? Fem!Reader x Kuvira. Rated mature for foul language and mentions of death and violence.
Relationships: Kuvira (Avatar) & Reader, Kuvira (Avatar)/Reader
Kudos: 16





	The Guilty Consequences

“Great Uniter?”

Your gentle voice draws Kuvira’s attention away from the cockpit’s windows of her enormous mecha suit, which is currently situated over the rubble of what used to be President Raiko’s office. After successfully stopping Team Avatar from meddling in Kuvira’s efforts to conquer Republic City, the rest of the United Republic of Nations fell neatly into the hands of the Earth Empire. Korra and her friends were clever enough to believe that kidnapping Kuvira’s so-called fiancé and using him as a bargaining chip would convince her to give up the assault on Republic City. Little did they know, Kuvira was ecstatic to seize the opportunity to rid herself of the engagement  _ and  _ wipe out Team Avatar for the good of the empire. One simple blast of her mecha’s spirit cannon directed towards Future Industry’s factory killed two birds with one stone. Of course, Kuvira still had to worry about Korra’s reincarnation when the new earthbending Avatar came of age, but seeing as how they would be reborn into the Earth Empire, the Great Uniter was not concerned about the future Avatar’s actions for now. She would worry about that problem on another day. For now, the aftermath of Republic City’s defeat was a more pressing matter.

The corner of Kuvira’s lip twitches upward in a faint smile when she turns to meet your gaze. You stride towards her and wrap an arm around her waist before planting a quick kiss on the beauty mark underneath her eye. A noise of contentment emanates somewhere deep in her throat as she leans into your touch. “You know you don’t have to call me Great Uniter, Y/N. Especially not when we’re alone.” 

“Oh trust me, I know,” you retorted. “I just thought it would be fitting to use your official title to commemorate you on a job well done. The Earth Empire is completely unified now thanks to you.” 

Kuvira’s eyes flicker back to surveying the remnants of Republic City. “You flatter me, Y/N. I hardly completed the effort on my own. There were my soldiers, my engineers, and don’t forget the radio technician that triangulated Team Avatar and Baatar’s location in Future Industry’s factory. We’d still be at war with Republic City if it weren’t for their intel. I owe my success to my loyal followers, and especially to you. I don’t regret appointing you to draft annexation treaties for the states that yielded peacefully.” She chuckled softly. “I would’ve never gotten to know you so intimately if I hadn’t done that, much less had the privilege to call you mine.” She presses an innocent kiss to the corner of your mouth. 

You scoffed playfully and pulled back from Kuvira’s waist. “You give yourself too little credit! Not many people would’ve had the mental fortitude to take out your strongest opposition using the spirit cannon. The Earth Empire exists because of you.” You lower your voice and snuggle back to Kuvira’s side. “You know… I’m kinda glad that you did it, even if it sounds awful. It’s unfortunate that Korra and Baatar are gone, but at least we don’t have to worry about the Avatar for another sixteen-something years. We don’t have to hide our relationship from everyone anymore, and you don’t have to pretend to be attracted to some gross guy. We can be authentically together in peace while you build your nation. That’s what matters.” A twinge of guilt spreads through your chest when you dare to defile Korra and Baatar, but you ignore it as best as possible.  _ This is for the best,  _ you repeat to yourself. Funnily enough, that phrase has become a personal mantra for both you and your lover.

You felt Kuvira’s muscles stiffen almost imperceptibly when she heard the words “Avatar” and her ex-fiancé’s name on your lips. Surely she must feel relieved that she doesn’t have to fake being in love with a man as a cheap cover-up for her true sexuality, even if he was taken out of the picture a  _ tad _ bit brusquely, to say the least. She also doesn’t have Korra breathing down her neck anymore, so what gives? Kuvira’s eyes are glued to the windows offering a panoramic view of the leagues and leagues of wreckage. She remains uncomfortably quiet. 

Unsure of whether or not Kuvira wants you to remain clinging onto her, you start pulling away when she shows no sign of breaking the silence. You’ve been romantically involved with Kuvira for three years now, and you know that when she clams up, there’s no use trying to pry her open until she’s ready. During the first few months of your relationship, she would often have trouble separating her outwardly ambitious and cunning persona from her inwardly vulnerable and tender true self. On days where her reunification efforts fell behind schedule or the Avatar knocked her carefully calculated plans awry, Kuvira’s sour mood leaked into your personal lives. At times, she would inadvertently lapse into Great Uniter-mode while you were trying to relax together after a long day’s work. It wasn’t until you gently coaxed her out of her tension that she began to share what was weighing heavily on her mind. You supported her as best as you could, but when it came to more delicate topics, such as her childhood, her relationship with her adoptive family, or her innermost feelings, Kuvira shut down. She would come clean to you when she was prepared to talk. All would reveal itself in due time. 

You murmured something vague about seeing her later as you padded quietly towards the door. Just as you were about to leave the mecha’s cockpit, a feeble voice called out for you to wait. Stopping in your tracks, you spun on your toes to look at Kuvira. The orange sunset filtered in through the windows and outlined her body in a shimmering glow, which seemed to have a softening effect on her unusually tense body language. Her entire frame was as rigid as a steel beam, legs shoulder-width apart, arms poised behind her back. Her brow was furrowed ever-so-slightly and the corner of her eyes were pinched, as if she was lost in thought or fighting off a headache.

“Y/N,” she ventured. She inhaled sharply before continuing. “I thought reuniting the Earth Empire and conquering the United Republic of Nations would be… different. Ever since Suyin refused to stabilize Ba Sing Se and share Zaofu’s progressiveness, I believed I was the only person competent enough to take initiative. I stepped up to the plate and accomplished my goals. The Earth Empire is stronger than ever. I’m finally in the position to launch industrialization and modernization campaigns in villages neglected by that archaic monarchy everyone despised. I restored order where there was anarchy. I stopped lawless bandits stealing from the poor. I gave resources to the needy when we annexed states, yet…” her eyes flutter closed for a moment as she pauses to collect her thoughts. When she reopens her eyes, her jade colored eyes plead silently at you. Even when you’re standing across the cockpit from each other, you notice that her shoulders are trembling ever-so-slightly. 

You’re astonished at Kuvira’s rare moment of vulnerability. Usually it takes her a few hours, maybe a day or two, for her to open up about a touchy subject. Even then, she’s not one to show emotion so openly on her countenance, not unless she’s severely distressed and totally certain that you and her are alone together. You took a few hesitant steps towards her. 

“You thought winning would be different, huh?” Unsure of how to proceed, you decided to try your hand at a bit of light-hearted banter to see if it might have an effect on your lover. “Well,  _ yeah  _ winning was going to be different! You made your plans based on the assumption that Korra would always be a pain in the ass even after we annexed the United Republic and started our projects, but now you don’t have to worry about her anymore! What about the wedding? You don’t have to marry a guy you don’t love, and we don’t have to worry about hiding our relationship from everyone. Isn’t that a weight off your shoulders?” Despite your confession, you knew the loss of life was a tragedy. You convinced yourself that it was for the greater good, and you knew Kuvira shared your sentiment.  _ This is for the best _ , you recited. You shimmied towards her and reached out to hold her gloved hands in your own. Icy fingers of anxiety began to spider its way throughout your chest when you looked into her eyes plagued by fear. “Kuvira… is everything alright?” You squeezed her quivering hands for emphasis. 

Kuvira’s eyes flitted to a spot right over your shoulder. “That’s not what I meant, Y/N. I meant I thought winning would be better than this.” 

“Better?” 

“Yes. Better.” It appears Kuvira is becoming irritated at you.

“Kuvira, I won’t understand what you’re trying to say if you keep beating around the bush like that. Why isn’t this better?” 

Kuvira lets out an exasperated groan and yanks her hands away from you. “Don’t pretend to be stupid, Y/N. You  _ know _ what I’m talking about. There’s more good in the Earth Empire than bad. At least, that’s what I keep trying to convince myself.  _ This is for the best _ , we would always say. I made more progress than what I took away from people. The price I paid— no, the price  _ other  _ people paid— for my progress was justified. Isn’t it?” Kuvira’s voice falters on the last two words tumbling out of her lips. “What good is ruling the Earth Empire if all I have to show for it is a pile of rubble? Just look at this! How am I supposed to uplift my people if  _ this  _ is what I have to work with?” Her voice steadily rose in volume the more she spoke, until she was practically yelling when she swept her arm to the window showcasing Republic City’s destroyed buildings. 

The adrenaline rushing through your body begins to drown out all hopes of rational thought and speech. You find yourself raising your voice to match your lover’s anger. “Kuvira, I thought this is what you  _ wanted _ . You wanted to tear out the old and bring in the new. That’s all you ever talked about when we were campaigning. Why are you changing your mind now?” 

“For fuck’s sake, don’t you see? You even said it yourself! It’s a tragedy that the Avatar and my ex-fiancé and all these other people are gone.” Kuvira’s eyes flash dangerously with seething rage. “Why did I make other people pay for my hopes and dreams for the Earth Empire? I dethroned Prince Wu and ridiculed him in front of the whole world, I threatened to let people die if they didn’t join me, I forced Varrick to build a weapon of mass destruction, I destroyed the most spiritual and sacred tree in the Foggy Swamp for the sake of violence, I didn’t hesitate to put dissenters in reeducation camps to be brainwashed and dehumanized.” She takes a ragged breath before bellowing “I  _ murdered  _ people with my spirit cannon. Why didn’t you  _ fucking  _ stop me, Y/N?”

Your voice reaches a shrill pitch as you hurl back your rebuttal. “I didn’t stop you because  _ this _ is what you wanted,” pointing an accusing finger towards Kuvira to accentuate your points. “You’re charismatic enough to make other people agree with you. You convinced yourself you were doing this for everyone else’s good, and you convinced me, too. Don’t you remember?  _ This is for the best. _ No one stopped you because you locked yourself in an echo chamber filled with people that agreed with your plans. And when someone  _ did  _ have the courage to speak up, you sent them to reeducation camps, threatened their lives, or outright killed them.” 

“So you think this is  _ my  _ fault?” Kuvira takes an intimidating step towards you and looks down upon you threateningly. Her voice drops to a dangerously low growl. “Me? This is all  _ me _ ?” 

“Now it’s your turn to stop being dense, Kuvira. You just admitted that you thought winning would be different and you just gave a guilt-ridden speech about making other people pay for your mistakes. Open your  _ damn  _ eyes!” 

Kuvira abruptly pivots her body away from you and takes several steps back. “You are dismissed, soldier,” she whispered in a cold voice as unyielding as steel. She resumed looking out the window with her arms behind her back. 

“Seriously, Kuvira?” you moan. “You can’t just push me away like that when you’re so close to realizing the truth. Why don’t you listen to me? Why don’t you listen to yourself?” You cautiously take a step closer before she whips around and metalbends a fragment of her shoulder plate in your general direction which misses your face by a mere hairsbreadth. Your body freezes as your mind races to comprehend that Kuvira would dare threaten your safety. 

“Leave me, Y/N.” Kuvira refuses to look at you.

You stand motionless for a moment that stretches on for an eternity as your eyes overflow with bitter tears. The cockpit’s door slams loud enough to reverberate throughout the mecha suit as you plod your way down to the nearest exit and catch a ferry to Kuvira’s base of operations on Air Temple Island, knowing she would meet you there when she was ready to be calm and civilized. The whole time you spent traveling from the giant mecha to Republic City’s docks, throngs of weary-eyed refugees peeking behind piles of rubble plagued your sights. Thankfully, the two bodyguards escorting you to the personal quarters you shared with Kuvira kept the masses at bay, but the stark reality of so many war-torn people suffering from the conflict infected your guilty conscience. You roughly dismissed your bodyguards once you set foot on the Island and wasted no time briskly marching to your shared bedroom. You hoped the evening’s darkness masked the silent tears flowing down your cheeks. 

Your nightmares consisted of petrified throngs of innocent people fleeing Kuvira’s army. Exhausted bodies toiling away in reeducation camps. The terror etched upon soldiers’ faces as Kuvira intimidated them with violence. And finally, a vision of what you imagined Baatar’s, Korra’s, and the rest of Team Avatar’s last moments on earth must’ve been like before an overpowering purple light burned their bodies out of existence. 

You jolted upright in bed drenched in a cold sweat and gasping for air. “Fuck,” you stammered under your breath over and over. “Fucking fuckity fuck. Kuvira really  _ did  _ convince me that everything was for the best, didn’t she?” You didn’t want to believe it at first, but the nagging voice lingering somewhere in your head relentlessly reminded you that this destruction wasn’t worth thousands upon thousands of ruined lives. 

Your only job in the Earth Empire’s army was to help expedite the political and legal process of unifying a country. If your position was relatively peaceful and bloodless, you couldn’t begin to imagine Kuvira’s guilt about orchestrating this three year long operation. _How am I supposed to convince Kuvira to see the light?_ you pondered. _She was so close to realizing it before she snapped at me. Maybe I can talk to her again and_ —   
An abrupt knocking shook you out of your thoughts. _I thought I told those guards to leave me alone._ You shuffled to the door and slid it open, half expecting for it to be another diplomat’s messenger begging for you to revise this oh-so-important legal paperwork that couldn’t _possibly_ wait until morning, until you looked up and saw Kuvira slouched against the doorframe. Her chocolate-colored hair cascaded about her shoulders, and her uniform was rumpled from head to toe. You could count on one hand the number of times Kuvira allowed herself to look this haggard, and frankly, the fact that she looked this way hours after your fight in the cockpit led you to believe that maybe she had taken your advice seriously. 

“Kuvira?” you gasped.

“Y/N,” she mumbled feebly. “I’m sorry. I know you probably don’t want to see me after how I reacted, but I don’t know where else to go.” Her voice quavered. “I don’t have anyone else who I can trust with these feelings that are eating me up inside, and I thought maybe you could…” her sentence trailed off unfinished. “Before you left, you mentioned that you knew all of  _ this _ ,” she gestured vaguely at the surrounding area, “was wrong, but I convinced you that it was okay, and I convinced myself that it was okay too, but now I realize that it’s wrong and for fuck’s sake I don’t know what to do about it now.” The last of her strength escaped her body and she crumpled to the floor in a heap of unrestrained sobbing.

Swooping down to the floor alongside her, you promptly wrapped your arms around her shoulders and nestled her into your embrace. Whatever animosity you felt because of how she shooed you out of the cockpit had dissipated. Your fingers threaded themselves into the locks of her hair as you whispered soothing words. 

“I’m so sorry I pulled the entire world down with me. I’m so sorry I ruined nearly everyone’s life.” The full force of her words bubbled out of her mouth uninhibited by her previous attempts of restraint. She couldn’t stop talking now if she tried. “I saw how hopeless my nation was after it descended into lawlessness. I was willing to pay the ultimate price to nurture it into something stronger than ever before, but I didn’t realize I had no authority to take away other people’s autonomy. I had no right to take lives, no right to let people suffer when I didn’t get what I wanted, no right to let people starve on the streets if a state didn’t join the Empire, no right to usurp power, no right to throw the entire world out of balance by murdering the Avatar just to achieve my vision.” She buries her face into your nightshirt before choking out her final sentences. “I’m so sorry I pulled you down with me, Y/N. I especially didn’t want to threaten you the way I did earlier. You’re the last person I ever want to hurt.” 

You feel that Kuvira’s sorrow is rather misplaced. She shouldn’t be entirely apologizing to  _ you,  _ but rather to the whole world and everyone whom’s lives she changed for the worse. But now is not the time to object to her apology. For now, you let her weep into your chest for several minutes until her tears subside and her body stops trembling.

After her emotions have stabilized somewhat, you help your lover stand on her feet and guide her to the edge of the mattress. You gently work out the knots in her hair using your fingers and begin to strip the layers of her uniform off her body. She tries protesting by claiming that she’s perfectly capable of doing it herself, but you discourage her by pressing a finger to her lips and muttering “you’ve had a rough day in more ways than one. Let me help you get ready for bed.” Once you’ve helped her don her nightclothes, you stretched yourself out on the bedsheets and gently pulled her into your protective embrace once more. 

Several minutes of silence pass like this, Kuvira curled up flush against your body, before you felt it was safe to express your thoughts about her confession. “Kuvira, I appreciate you apologizing to me, but I’m not the only person you should be apologizing to. Telling me you’re sorry isn’t going to absolve all of your guilt.” 

“I know,” she said. “I know I have a long journey ahead of me, but you were the first person I felt I needed to apologize to before I kept going.” 

“I say this with love, but I think you owe an apology to the entire world. You can’t keep living in guilt like this.” 

Kuvira pauses briefly before saying “I don’t think I could live with myself if I keep being the Great Uniter. The position I created for myself carries too much blood and suffering.” 

“Does that mean you’re going to stop being the Great Uniter?” 

“I think I’m going to convene with all the major world leaders. Raiko is still around somewhere, and so is Prince Wu, Tenzin, the Beifongs, Fire Lord Izumi. I still want the country to be modernized like the rest of the world, but I think it’s best if they take the reins. I don’t think they’d appreciate me doing the work after how I’ve hurt everyone. I’ll arrange a speech announcing my decision to permanently step down. And then,” she takes a shaky breath, “I’ll happily walk into a courtroom and accept whatever punishment the law deems fit.”

“I’ll admit, I didn’t expect you to take such a drastic decision so quickly, but I’m glad you did. I’m not blameless either, Kuvira. I’m sorry for enabling you. I hope I can make up for it by being with you every step of the way.”

An unamused grin creeps upon Kuvira’s face. “Even if it means we’ll go to prison together?”

“ _ Especially  _ if it means we go to prison together,” you chided. “How else would I keep you company? I wouldn’t leave you all by yourself. Maybe we can be cellmates.” Her face is still marred red-rimmed eyes and a slight scowl. If you dared to tickle her, she might crack a genuine smile for the first time since Republic City fell. 

You dig your fingers into Kuvira’s side, eliciting a sharp yelp from her before she’s overcome by a fit of giggles. The sound of Kuvira’s mirth is a treat she rarely shares with anyone, especially since she shouldered this massive enterprise. Who knows when you’d ever get to hear or see her happy like this?

A fraction of the tension in her body has melted away after her laughter subsides. “Thank you sincerely. Your support is priceless, and so is your humor.” She snuggles closer into your body before murmuring “I love you, Y/N” into your shoulder. 

“I love you too,” you whispered before you both drifted off to sleep. The peace between you and Kuvira would be radically different, if not uncertain, by the time she calls upon the world leaders and steps down. For at least this one silent night, you can cherish your last few moments of freedom together with her. 


End file.
